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The thunderous sound rang out in the royal dancing chamber. At first I thought my beloved [and lost] Gawain was hurt in some way by the jealous ladies-in-waiting, as he tore off the nailed vest when he left the ball. Then I thought I was shot, then remembered the dampness on the front of my gown was from another source. Suddenly, a shout rose above the crowd: "The king lies dead. Long live the Queen!" A chant ensued. Queenie ran to the kings body as it lay prone and still. shot in a heart that no longer beat. Queenie's tears appeared instantly as she spoke: I will serve you well and find the perpetrator of this dastardly deed! Thank you for your support. Rather than embrace the queen, the crowd turned to me and said: "Check Queenie's bodice, We believe the weapon of death is stored there. She grieves falsely and wanted the throne! "I was in shock. Malo, Gidget and Shamrock took it upon themselves, as my loyal friends, to reach into Queenie's awkwardly shaped bodice and pulled out a small pistol. It was still smoking slightly and it enraged the crowd. 
The crown was taken from Queenie that night, and placed on my head in a brief ceremony that was bittersweet, as Queenie stood and wept. Shortly after, she was taken to the dungeon to await her fate.
Her trial was short and punitive and damning. She was whisked off to the gallows to be hung in a fortnight. Lady Pennypenny went with her, as did Edna Mae and Mastifflover.
Pupshin, my beloved dog, howled at night as I attempted to sleep in my new chambers. She would rush out into the night and scrape the wood outside the door to the guillotine room. I tried not to pay any attention but even Wonderwoman and Ruth, my new assistants , remarked on Pupshin's adamancy.
Ex-prince Consort made a doting father to my young heart...and, surprisingly, a loyal husband to Queenie. After Lockjaw and his royal embarrassment being caught behind the curtain with Niki, he truly mended his ways. I saw them often through the window in the turret room holding hands and sharing kisses... he and Queenie, that is. He told me once he felt badly about the way he had treated my mother and me...after going in disguise to a wenches liberation meeting and hearing Terries speak. I would have loved to see him in the blonde wig and peasant gown!!!! Ha Ha Ha. But, I digress...
I followed Pupshin this dark night, and lo and holy behold, I thought I saw an apparition sleeping on a a pallet beside the guillotine itself..could it be , noooooooo...not in my worst nightmares....
ELHS1968!. My imaginary and only friend as a wee child was snoring as blissfully as a vaporous mist. I tried to grab her shoulder to wake her, but it was like touching a thick cloud! She stretched and yawned and said: "My sweet little friend. You have grown wonderfully, while I am still a mite...humans are so lucky"and she chuckled. How do you love me, now that I have given you your hearts desire? "You are the queen, the other queen is days from losing her head to this monstrous bed of mine...the small pistol invention works like a charm...Queenie hardly felt it as I tucked it in her bodice. I am such a sweet puff, am I not??"
Sorry, I just woke up from a mother-in-waiting nap. Gawain woke me to see if I wanted to sacrifice for the queen, and have a queenly romp later today. I think I will. The children are out with Norman and Queeniereads for a day at the new library she has recently added to the castle. She likes to read them stories she has made up about frogs and princes. Later they are going to a cookout on the Twin Mountains as it is Blanches 45th birthday and she is having the Chippendales perform. They are a randy group, I am told, and seem to bring Mothers wayward passions alight. She still has trouble with reality and loves it that way! (She told me all 18 guys took her dancing with little slingshots and bowties on. What an imagination,,,,surely not.)
To bring you up to date, Gawain heard I had released Queeniereads and gave her back the throne. Did he act arrogant and come back to collect my waif-like self? NO, not the light of my life! He first had a small castle built right on the side of Twin Mountains (by her gallbladder, Mum says.) Then he installed weaving machines for Aerrick, Amberina, China and Shamrock to fashion low cost baby wear from cotton and flameproof polyester. Gidget was given a laboratory to create an ointment for pain sufferers and to counsel all who had physical/psychological bruising. Malo was given the first printing press since Gutenberg (I will humbly admit to inventing GutenFred Machines). Mastifflover was given an acre of cleared field (downwind) to shelter abandoned puppies and retired flamingos and Blowzy peasants who could not tolerate the brisk trade going on in their former small town. Gawain then proposed on a bent knee as the Dixie Chicks (Niki, Suggie and Swbear) sang a song written by Lady Kitten and Maureen. (Dont Come home adrinkinor something romantic like that).
The wedding was almost as wild, but the best part is when my Daddy gave me away!
Yes, Prince Consort has made a wonderful grandfather, He and Gawain occasionally hit a little white ball with weird sticks and count a score. (I believe I will invent a metal for the sticks and work my polyester magic on the balls.call it Glf.)
ELHS has never appeared after I shooed her ass out of the castle and threatened her with boars bellies for wings if she showed up again. I am sssssooooo popular, first as a wealthy, happily-married- to-a- philanthropist woman; second, no-one believes the true reason I had to give the throne back, so they think I sacrificed my Royal Rights for love with Gawain.
Thats alright. I probably would have anyway. I cant imagine a life without my old man and my adorable children and my 35-acre inventorium. I have patents on brassieres with padding to make a priest blush; polyester pink flamingoes for every home entry; a new line of cosmetics called Avon on the Beauty Queens. Men use it too.
Remember my Uncle Percival? He has been a wonderful partner, along with the bartender and his sister Gypsyqueen in promoting the Avon empire. And it continues...
Queeniereads, my story is dedicated to your highness; for grace under pressure and for showing us all the healing power of unconditional love and forgiveness. I bow to your splendor.
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