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The years they pass so sorrowfully slow.
Just yesterday I was a sprightly young miss that every man and his son once sought my hand in one licentious deed or another. Up to and including marriage, they vowed. I was so picky then that I harbored loves sweet promise for twenty-four long years. Then when my prince did enter the doors of my heart, he fled like the wind that blew him and his healthy (!) horse in.
Now I am a wilting flower...well,
okay maybe not all of me,
ahem...left on the edge of life.
My one hope for a future of wealth and promise is my daughter Federica. "Freddi," as she insists on being called, is learning her letters and drawing grandiose pictures of the castle people whenever she can get the new bartender Jovanny to sit a spell and help with her schooling. Yes, I had to hire someone to handle my former duties, as my daughter has demanded my attentions. I hired the educated gypsy that told my fortune once. His sister "Gypsyqueen Rose Lee" also does the entertainment on Saturday nights. [No, she does not tell fortunes, but she does a raunchy showstopper in the middle of the bands revelries.] The tips she brings in is as much as her brother makes in a week, but he enjoys his work and gets a room upstairs rent-free. I am selling mysterious colognes from Avon, a place up north. I go door to door, but I get to take my 5 year-old with me. And the commissions arent bad.
My neighbor Niki.senior is a cousin of Lady Nickel-nickel, who works as a handmaiden for the queen. Apparently Lady N.N did this work also when she was raising her daughter Lady Penny-Penny, and still finds time to distribute the little books. I hope my daughter will also be as enterprising as the Queens handmaiden! Freddi has an imaginary friend she has named ELHS1868, and so I think Freddi has a flair for the unusual........
Yes, the Prince Consort comes to Blowzy from time to time, usually accompanied by his brother Lord Percival. Norman (or "Normie" as his wife is wont to call him) stills ogles my upper portions when he is imbibing. If he is the designated coachman, he even tries to fob off his brother as the father of my child! The bounder! Percival shows no interest in me, but tries to engage Jovanny in conversation whenever possible.
As predicted 5 ˝ years ago, the Prince woke up one morning without his left eyeball in its socket! He was especially soused the night previous as so does not remember all the particulars.
 . It is rumored that Queenie Reads read Normans diary, recounting the golden days of his youth... and a certain buxomly lass in a tavernand was not pleased. I am not here to spread rumors, however, and doubt the tale. She seems a pleasant woman, if you like blonde looks, feathers, and frippery! She should be happy that he was such a capable student of her literary tutelage that he could write the accounting! I admit to a certain pride that I am so blissfully remembered, but know he will never make public his fatherhood of my child.
It seems I may be with child again. I needed a ride to turn in my Avon order last month, and had to traverse the Twin Mountains (or Hooters Heaven as they are affectionately dubbed by the band in Blowzy.) The coachman was so awed by my Occur perfume and Avon Lip Blush that he fair went crazy. My fault, I admit. It was the newest products that finally were his downfall: Irish Kohl Eyes and décolletage frosted powder, labeled "Fashion Pears". I feel I took extreme chances wearing it all at once and harbor this man no ill-will. I just hope I have a male child this time, so I have a better chance of fighting for my daughters rightful place in the castle!!
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